Burning Attraction Page 5

  I don't reply again because I'm not sure how to. Why does this have to happen to me? I wish I could put a defined definition on both guys and be done with it. Sad thing is, I don't know what definition I want to put on either guy.

  Aubrey helps me get ready, but I tell her I don't want to look too sexy tonight. I want to look like myself, casual, but with a little edge. She does a perfect job listening, and when I'm ready, I'm more excited than ever to go to the party. I've been asking Aubrey advice on what I should do with the two guys that I'm falling for, and she says to let it go. Just let it happen. Everything happens for a reason and that things will sort themselves out. I don't know how true it all is, but I will listen to her and just play things as they go. I may get hurt in the end, and someone else might too, but it's the way of life. My life that is.

  Carson is ready and waiting when I walk into the frat house. He goes with me to get a drink and we head outside. "I'm heading home in two weeks, would you want to come meet my family?" he asks me skeptically when we settle on the bench out here.

  "Oh, I would love that!" I know we haven't made things official, but he talks about how wonderful his mom and sisters are all the time. I've wanted to meet them, as nervous as it makes me, I just didn't want to ask. Plus, if I meet his family now, I won't feel awkward having him meet my parents.

  I hear the relief wash off his voice, "good. I think you'll really love them."

  "Well if they're anything like you, I'm sure I will." Both of us kind of look everywhere but each other. I just practically said I love him, but I don't. I didn't mean it like that. He is sweet and perfect, and I'm falling, I can feel it each time we talk. I'm just not there, not yet. After a very long minute I look back at him, acting nonchalant about the whole ordeal. "I'm kind of cold out here, it's breezy. Can we go back in? Maybe play some beer pong?"

  He smiles at me. "Of course, let’s go." He puts his arm over my shoulder when we head in, warming me up.

  I spot Avery the second we step foot inside but I try to pretend I don't notice him as we walk up to a pledge. Carson nudges my shoulder, "hey, isn't that Avery right there?" He points over to the right of the room and I look over at Avery, who is starring right at me, with an amused smirk.

  "Yeah, that's him," I say but turn my head to face towards Carson without as much as a smile in Avery's direction. My stomach is doing flips so much worse than I had expected.

  I start walking in the complete opposite direction, which happens to be where the dance floor is, when I hear Avery's voice call my name. I pause and breathe in deeply before turning around, making sure I smile at him this time. "Hi Avery," I say as he makes his way to Carson and I.

  "Hey there Angel. Hey man, I'm Avery," he says to Carson, nodding his head the way guys do.

  "Carson. I heard about your fight Saturday man, you knocked Pierce the fuck out. You're legendary, I hope to see you fight sometime." Oh boy, he is going to mention I said he could, I know it. I press my lips together and just watch both their reactions the best I can. Avery still looks amused as ever and Carson is as giddy as humanly possible. If only he knew my feelings for Avery, he defiantly wouldn't be so happy.

  Avery's smirk extends so that only one side of his face is smiling. It's adorable in the sexiest way imaginable. I have to swallow three times before I'm able to breathe correctly. "Glad to hear, thanks man," he says to Carson then looks at me, "I'd invite you along next time, but I don't think there’s room on my motorcycle."

  I'm about to punch the smug little expression off Avery's face, how dare he! My eyes bulge immediately but I try to play it off and laugh, then look at Carson. "He's a character. Anyways, want to go dance or something?"

  Carson just looks back and forth between the two us for a second. I'm so nervous right now. I don't know what expression Avery has because I refuse to look at him. And I feel bad for Carson, he is hearing all sorts of things I did Saturday night from two very attractive men. He doesn't look mad, but he doesn't look happy. He just maybe looks understanding. "Yeah, let’s go dance beautiful," he says, taking my elbow with his firm hand.

  "See you later Cassie," Avery calls from behind me but I ignore him. I don't even turn my head that way, I'm too angry.

  I'm glad that Carson doesn't bring anything up. We just dance and grind together, enjoying each other and ourselves. When the night is closing in and people start leaving he whispers in my ear he'd like to go upstairs and I follow. As I'm heading up the stairs behind him, I can feel someone watching me, so I look over to my left and see Avery smiling while shaking his head at me. I just glare at him, which causes a small laugh to noticeably escape him, but I turn my head and continue to follow Carson up the stairs.

  "Did you have a fun night?" Carson asks me when we get in his room. I shut the door behind me and slide out of my shoes, making my way over to cuddle up next to Carson, who is now laying on his bed.

  "Yeah, I did. I always do with you," I say, giving him a kiss on the cheek.

  He looks over at me, his dark blue eyes smiling at my own. The thing with Carson is he is sexy until you compare him to someone like Avery. If you had never seen Avery, you would look at Carson and drool for hours. But sadly, I have no choice but to compare the two of them. I will say though, that Carson is utterly handsome. He has two tattoos on him, one on his shoulder and one on his rib cage, but since they're not noticeable until his shirt is off, he can keep up the handsome look well. He is perfection in a bottle, and I'm surprised that he isn't on the cover of GQ or modeling for Abercrombie. He should be!

  It seems like time just passes by as we stare at one another, not saying a word. Words don't need to be spoken and I love it, it isn't awkward like you would expect. I'm nearly startled when Carson finally does speak up, although, it's almost in a whisper. "I like you a lot Cassie."

  "I like you, too, Carson," I mumble back.

  When he speaks again, it's almost like I didn't even say anything at all. I'm sure he has been rehearsing his words in his head for a while now. "You take me off guard a little sometimes, but it's not a bad thing. I know I call you beautiful a lot, but don't think that is just it. It's what made me talk to you at first, but you're genuine and smart and funny. I can talk to you for hours and never get bored. And I'll admit, you do scare me, because I do see how guys look at you and I know you could have any single one that you want. And I don't want to lose you. I know you said you wanted to take things slow, and I'll go as slow as you need. Don't ever feel pressured. But what I'm trying to say is, I'd really like if we could be official. I want you as my girlfriend Cassandra. But only if that is what you want."

  He almost looks sheepish as he says it all, and I stare back at him a little surprised. I knew this would come up and I'm not surprised by any of his words. It just surprises me that between meeting Peirce and Avery this week and knowing I withheld information from him, and knowing I was on Avery's motorcycle Saturday night, he is still asking me to be his girlfriend. And I don't know what I'm supposed to say. I like him, I do, I like him so much, I don't ever want to lose him. But what if I say yes and I loose Avery? Then again, we're just friends. He said with his own words that he doesn't do the relationship thing. And although, I hadn't planned on it, if I say no to Carson, I may lose him and I don't want to. I really do like him so much, I'm falling for him already.

  "I'd like that, a lot." I smile at his expression, which is a mixture of relief and happiness. He grabs ahold of my face with his hands and kisses me firmly on the lips. His kiss says it all, it tells me how happy he is, how much he adores me, how much he wants me. I flick my tongue out and he opens his mouth, welcoming our tongues to glide together. I get so caught up in the moment, I roll onto my back, pulling Carson on top of me. I separate my legs and he grinds into me, causing a moan to escape from my mouth into his.

  He pulls away long enough to get us both undressed and he reaches over to grab a condom out of his night stand. Once it's secured he lays back over me, looking at my face with his desire fille
d eyes. My hands reach up and run along his muscular arms, until their behind his neck, and I pull him down to me. As his lips touch mine, his hardened cock meets my heated entrance. I moan loudly as he fills me up inside. He pauses for a second before slowly pulling out and thrusting into me. Carson is amazing at sex and I could do this every single day with him and never get bored.

  Thrust after thrust, I can feel my orgasm building. Carson leans down and bites at my ear lobe, "you feel amazing Cassandra." Hearing my name come out his mouth filled with desire turns me into dust. I wrap my legs tight around his waist as I dig my fingernails into his shoulder blades. I know I draw blood, but I can't help it because he is just that amazing. I can feel myself pulsating against his erection as I'm getting closer and closer to releasing. "Come for me baby, I want to feel you come around my dick."

  "Fuck!" I scream out. "Holy fuck Carson, harder!" He listens and pumps into me so hard I black out momentarily. My toes curl and my back arches, causing my chest to push into his hard pecks.

  I can feel as Carson gets off. "Shit Cassie, fuck. That feels so fuckin' good," he pants out.

  "Mm," I moan, "it does." I'm so breathless. He lays on top of me, his cock still inside me, while we catch our breath.

  He pulls out of me, and it causes me to shiver in a delightful way. He smiles down at me and I can't help but smile back. "I'm so glad you're mine," he says. My heart races and everything feels right.

  "Me too Carson, you have no idea." And it's true. I can honestly say I'm extremely happy. It may be the post orgasm from the mind blowing sex, but right now, I feel like I made the right decision in saying yes to Carson. He will make me a happy girl. Whereas, if I were with someone like Avery, I'd be a wreck. He is too wild of a guy to be in a relationship. Carson has a wild side, but only when he wants to have one. He knows how to tame it, and he does a great job where I'm involved.

  Chapter 5: Mistakes

  The following five weeks go by surprisingly perfect with Carson. We get along so well, that sometimes I have to pinch myself to make sure I'm not dreaming. I have only seen Avery around school, and he typically ignores me. Although, every now and again I catch him starring from a distance, usually with a small smile on his face, but he doesn't say anything to me. It was aggravating me the first few weeks, now I just don't even care. It has become his own problem and has nothing to do with me. Well, it has everything to do with me, but I pretend it doesn't.

  In six days is the Beta Theta Pi's annual Halloween party, so Aubrey and I are out shopping to find costumes. I never knew how hard it was to find a Halloween costume at eighteen. I haven't dressed up since I was ten or something like that, and I don't want to be a vampire or witch, I want to be sexy, cute and fun. I don't want to be one of those overly, okay, under-dressed girls. I don't want everyone seeing my twat.

  "Oh, this one!" I squeal, pulling a costume off the rack and showing Aubrey.

  She shakes her head and wrinkles her nose, "nope!" I put it back on the rack and continue to look around. "Oh, here, this one would be perfect for you Cassie."

  Aubrey pulls out a costume and it's a Playboy bunny, so we both start laughing. That is certainly not me. But funny thing is, it would be perfect for Aubrey. "Why don't you wear it?"

  She gives me a look of uncertainty. "I don't want to look like a hooker."

  "You won't, you'll look like a Playboy bunny." We both laugh and she shrugs.

  "Yeah, I think I might, actually. Whatever, who cares what people think. I'm sure there will be sluttier girls there." I have to agree with her completely. So many of them are slutty looking on a regular basis that I'm nervous as to how some are going to be dressed next weekend.

  We keep rummaging through the store and I'm denying everything. I don't know why I can't find the right outfit to wear. I gasp when I see a costume that I want to be, but then I shake it off and say never mind. Aubrey comes over and her eyes light up. "That'd be perfect!"

  I bite down on my lips, "yeah, it would be. But I don't know." I start walking off but I notice that Aubrey grabs it.

  "You're trying it on!" She grabs my elbow and walks me towards the fitting rooms and I don't argue with her. I get into the room and try on the costume, which takes a little time, then I come out and show Aubrey. "Holy fuck, yes!"

  Laughter escapes me, "you sure? You don't think it'll upset Carson?"

  She gives me a look of disgust. "Why the heck would that upset Carson? It's not like you even hang out with Avery or have been back to any of his fights!"

  "True," I say, thinking it over some. "Okay! I'll get it."

  "Yay!" Aubrey claps with excitement. "I'm so glad we found the best costumes ever. Don't worry either, I'll help you look ultra-sexy. You'll be the hottest female boxer of all time."

  I roll my eyes, but I have to agree with her. I can't wait to see the look on Carson's face. I do hope that he isn't upset that I'm coming as a fighter, but Aubrey has a point. Avery's name hasn't even come up between the two of us, or any of his fights. And since I don't talk to Avery, in fact, he hasn't even shown up to any parties since the last, Carson really doesn't have any reason to be jealous or anything.

  After our shopping trip, we decide to stop at a cafe to grab lunch. We're sitting in the outside patio when I get a weird tingle down my spine. I try to shake it off but it doesn't seem to disappear. I look around and see both Avery and Mason looking directly at me, both with smug little smiles on their faces. I roll my eyes, making it known I'm annoyed, and turn back to Aubrey to finish our conversation. I hear my name leave those luscious lips and I puff out a breath of air.

  "Hi Avery," I say with bit of bite.

  He chuckles before grabbing a chair from a different table and sliding it over to ours. He sits backwards in it and looks at me, smiling large. "How’s the boyfriend?" he actually dares to ask me, like we've been the best of friends the past few weeks. I wished weeks ago he would be jealous, but if he is right now, I'm mad. He doesn't deserve to be.

  Mason slides a chair over too and shakes his head at Avery. At least I'm not the only thinking he is being an ass. "He is fine, thanks for asking." I notice Aubrey eyeing Mason, and I really don't blame her. I've told her about him, but since I don't hang out with Avery I haven't gotten the chance to introduce them. "Mason, this is my friend Aubrey, Aubrey this is Mason, Avery's friend."

  "Hi," she squeaks out.

  He eyes her up and down, smiling at her. He looks pleased by what he sees and I'm extremely excited deep down. "Hey Aubrey."

  Avery laughs out loud when he takes notice. "Aww, little Ducky has a crush on my main man."

  Aubrey, me and Mason all turn and glare at Avery at the same time, which causes him to lose it with laughter. Then we all sort of laugh in our own awkward way. "So you ladies coming tonight?" Mason asks, looking first at Aubrey then me, then Avery, who looks annoyed all of a sudden.

  "To?" I ask cautiously.

  "Oh," Mason states. Avery shrugs at Mason and looks at me and smiles.

  "Got a fight tonight, at nine. You two should come out. Same place as before, I can leave your names with Porkchop if you want to come."

  I do. I want to go so freakin bad, last time was amazing. I just don't know if I could go without Carson. But I can't just ask Avery if Carson is invited, because that is rude. Then again, not asking is rude towards Carson, even if deep down I would rather him not go. Not that I don't want him there, I just like having this thing to myself. We spend almost every day together. I don't ever see Avery, and I'd love to support him. Here I am all over again, and now I realize how thankful I should have been the last five weeks. I look towards Aubrey, trying to get a reaction out of her and she seems like she wants to go just as bad. She had mentioned over and over how jealous she was of me. I press my lips together before looking back at Avery, "yeah, we'd love to."

  "Awesome." He says it so nonchalant, you would think he didn't care either way, but his facial expression says differently. It lights right up the second I say yes. I
feel a strange bubble of emotion in my gut, but I try to ignore it because there is nothing I can do it about it right now. "Oh, and this is a low key fight. It usually isn't known until an hour or two before the fight starts, but we found out this morning because there is four rounds. It's a first, but ever since the KO with Danielson, there hasn't been much going on, and now others want to become champ. He is going to be in it too, and I want you two to stay the fuck away from each other."

  I'm a little taken back, but I understand where he is coming from. "That's okay, you don't have to worry about me. I would rather not talk with him."

  His smile is smug, "good. And sorry to break your heart but no boyfriend. Mason will keep an eye on you two."

  Shit. I bite down on my lip and nod. "Um," I start to stutter, "just this time can we not tell him I'm there?" I swallow hard, scared of how that will make me sound.

  Avery doesn't even try to contain his smile. "He won't be hearing it from me Angel." He elbows Mason, who is now in quiet conversation with Aubrey, which has me so excited for her. "Come on man, we got shit to do. Let's let the ladies finish eating."

  We all say our good-byes to one another and I'm having a minor heart attack thinking about tonight. And also I'm praying to God that Carson doesn't find out about the fight, before or after. I don't want him to know I'm going and not inviting him. I feel sick to my stomach. "You okay Cassie? Your face is pale white!" Aubrey announces.

  I shake my head no. "What do I do?"

  She gives me an understanding smile. "Go have fun. You tell him about the fight tomorrow and tell him that it was a last minute call in from Avery, and you felt bad missing it. And that it was invite only. Either he will understand or he won’t, but he is so good to you, I have a feeling even if he is upset, he won't let you know."

  I feel better already. "Yeah, you're right Aubrey. You always are. Thanks."

  "Well of course I am. Oh, and we need to do a little extra shopping. I want a new outfit for tonight." She winks at me before finishing her food. I knew she would be excited about Mason, I should have hooked them up sooner.